Sunny Days in DC

Jack of All Trades, Master of 3-ish.

My very first Irish panic attack: tastes like ‘Merica!

on September 10, 2013

Of the settlement money I received when my lawsuit ended, I was supposed to save HALF for taxes, just in case. That shouldn’t have been hard for a normal fucking person, but my husband and I had just decided to move to a country in recession because life hates when things go easily for me. This morning, the husband and I looked at our bank account, and realized we had 1/4 of the settlement left.

Gentle readers, this takes us back to where I was when I first started writing this blog. Jobless. At home. Watching our bank accounts dwindle. It’s all very Circle of Life.

So now we get to the crux of it. When I first moved over here with my husband, I said that I would stay as long as financially possible. It’s been a month. I don’t know whether I should stay on and continue to look for a job, or move back to the States and try from there. What I do know is that we can’t sustain my being unemployed much longer.

The other day, I told my friend that I was giving this whole deal until October. If I haven’t found a job by then, I told her, I’ll have to move back. She felt I should extend my search time frame and cut myself some slack. But for those of us who have been unemployed and struggled not for weeks, not for months, but struggled for YEARS to get back on our feet and put a roof over the heads of our children, it’s not about just being proud of the progress you’ve made on the SEARCH. I need a JOB. I need money. I need to be able to pay the bills and get out of the house and not feel like I’m circling the drain AGAIN.

I don’t know, you guys. Do I stay? Do I go? But how much longer can we keep this up? How many more posts are y’all willing to read about my being unemployed, again? But I can’t complain too much; I agreed to move here… let’s see what my next move will be.

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29 responses to “My very first Irish panic attack: tastes like ‘Merica!

  1. Have you had any nibbles on a job? I don’t know what to tell you. I don’t think I can judge this one fairly at all. Have your feet touched the drain catcher thingy yet or are you just circling?
    I would hate, hate, hate to see you get depressed when you’re so far away.
    Know this…I love ya…I’m cheering for you….and if you need me…I’m right here.
    Love ya kiddo!

    • H. Stern says:

      Hi MoM. I have phone interviews almost daily, so that’s GREAT, but my second in-person is this Friday. The thing is, I want something NOW, and from the initial interview until they pull the trigger, that could be weeks. I’m trying not to panic, but you know me… that’s HARD.

      Also, Max sleeps with that Curious George doll you got for him, and he learned to say “Dino!” for that green dinosaur doll. Thank you SO much for them!!

  2. Ah gosh, that’s rough. There’s no guarantee you’ll find a job any quicker if you go back to the states though right? Although perhaps you have more support systems there for you. It’s one of those situations where without having a crystal ball, you can’t possibly know what the best thing to do is. What’s that quote…can’t remember the exact wording, but something like “When you are faced with a decision, make it to the best of your ability and then forget it, the moment of absolute certainty never arrives.” Accept that however hard you try, you won’t find a definitive answer about the best choice. Just weigh up the pros and cons, and make a decision. Good luck!

  3. I’ve circled the drain myself a few times – nothing fun about it. I don’t have any sage words of wisdom to share. Should you stay or should you go? One thing to consider is that Ireland does not appear to be on the verge of getting into pissing contests with anyone in the middle east.

  4. I think you should stay a bit longer and attempt to branch out in the job search if you can, or try other work avenues such a child-minding since people be havin’ ‘dem babies. Just a thought. If you can’t stand other people’s kids then never mind.

    If it helps, I’ll likely be back in the USA after I’m done my master’s so I’ll happily rent a bedroom from you in your house to help with your income πŸ˜›

  5. Sofia Leo says:

    Take a deep breath. It’s only been a month. Holiday Season will be there soon and if it’s anything like here, shops will need seasonal help. Might not be much, but it might put you in the same room with someone who can lead you to something better. It’s happened to me, more than once. Give it a little more time. Besides, you can’t move away from a place with so much cheese! And sausage! πŸ™‚

    • H. Stern says:

      Ahh, but I CAN’T work for the holidays, that’s the thing. Those sorts of jobs are protect and Irish-only. Sucks, huh? I’m networking via other Americans and moms I meet. Essentially, I accost other moms in the parks and make them be my friends. It’s how I roll. I’m sort of a terrifying human being when you know me in real life.

      • Sofia Leo says:

        LOL! The terrifying, desperate-for-work Mommy? That paints a vivid picture. I didn’t realize Holiday jobs were protected – they certainly aren’t here! Surely one of the other Moms will hire you just to get you to stop with the crazy eyes πŸ™‚

        • H. Stern says:

          Good point; they might pay me to go away.

          Aaaaaaaaaaaaactually, I was thinking this afternoon (as it rained), that there really aren’t enough indoor activities for toddlers. There are playgroups in the mornings, but afternoons are a bit of a rough one. I was thinking I might see if there was any interest, and then run something out of the community center. I’d serve coffee and tea and biscuits, and let the little bastards roam free in the gym like wee little gangs. For three euros a pop, I might make enough to at least HELP stay afloat. Bonus: Max has activities and playmates.

          • Sofia Leo says:

            That’s a wonderful idea! Add dogs, triple the rate (people will spend big $$ on their beloved pets) and you might be able to get ahead. Bonus: dogs + children = exhausted critters all ’round. The Moms will thank you! Also, if you offer snacks the dogs will be happy to clean up the kids πŸ™‚

  6. mwebster76 says:

    I say stay with your family and keep applying for jobs in both places. Who says you can only do one or the other? You may as well be with your family while you search.

  7. Stay. It hasn’t been long and things should pick up after the summer – and holiday season will mean places need help. (You never know who you’ll meet – networking is the best way to find jobs)
    There’s so much there to explore and live.
    We went through months/years of unemployment/not steady employment – and lived. Just be open and take some time.

  8. Stay. Look for leprechans.

  9. Stay. Something will fall into your lap. I can feel it. Keep enjoying Ireland and it will provide for you.

    • H. Stern says:

      My bills. My bills are falling into my lap.

      Also, my first draft of this response said “my balls,” so thanks for the laugh!

      • You don’t have to tell me about bills. I must have invented them — the way they keep sending me ones I have no way of paying! But start talking to everyone you meet about how you need a job to support your adorable tiny child and you will be pleasantly surprised.

  10. ekgo says:

    Just to throw some math at you, and we all know how very much I love me some math (which is to say not at all): Wouldn’t it cost more to return to the states and live two separate lives? And there will have to be visits so that will be more money…I see moving away costing more than staying, with or without employment.
    And, really, what’s the worst that could happen? You can’t pay your taxes Stateside next year? Then what? They’ll kick you out of the country? Or won’t let you back in? Nah, it’s the government, they’ll let you pay them back with interest! They’re very benevolent like that.
    So just go drink more Guinness until the panic subsides. And maybe do some laundry. And think of meee-eeee. ❀

    • H. Stern says:

      Right, so that’s the thing: if I move back, it WOULD cost more, but I would have a job. That’s sorta like spinning your wheels faster to stay in one place. Frankly, there was no way this move was going to go easily for us, so I think I just have to suck it up and think strategically. My best bet MIGHT be this playgroup thingy. If I can’t get the recreation center, maybe I can start it in my home, thereby also increasing the self esteem of the other moms when they see how shitty my living room is.

      Also, I was literally doing laundry JUST NOW and thinking, “Nope! still don’t understand it!”

  11. sassypanties says:

    Oh, this is easy: Move in with ME and we can be sister wives and learn to eat Matzah Ball Soup and stuff. You are always welcome…and you could be a kick ass apartment manager like me!!!

    Love you. I think if you slow your roll just a smidgen you will come out on top – with a job…

    • H. Stern says:

      If I slowed anything about my roll, I wouldn’t be the obsessive neurotic Jew you love so much! HOW SAD WOULD THAT BE?!?!?!

      • sassypanties says:

        So the sister wife thing is out then? Is that what you’re saying?

        And you’re right…I like my Jews medium to well on the scale of neurotic doneness. Something about your level of crazy makes me feel better about myself, somehow.

        In other news, last night we went to dinner and Nate informed me that before Alissa was born, I was feisty. It’s like as she was coming out of my body the feisty transferred to her and left me! He also reminded me that once when he was going to night school as well as working 70 hours a week, he cancelled dinner to work more hours one night and apparently I called him on the phone and told him, “I’m coming down there!”

        I guess he told the owners of the yacht building company that I was coming and he said they were SCARED! When I showed up, none if them would look me in the eye and cowered in the corner.

        I call bullshit on the whole thing. I don’t believe him. Does that sound like something I would do?

        Don’t answer that…

        Love you.

  12. Don’t panic (and, please, give yourself more than a month). Is there anyway you can get a temporary-not-what-I-want-to-do-but-I-need-the-cash job to tide you over?

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